It's time to crawl forward a bit, gents. Now lift your hands off the floor, hang them around your knees and take another step or two. Straighten up into a hunched over position. Take another few steps. Finally stretch out completely and walk tall out of that cave. That's right, it's time to evolve, manne. Time to move away from the old world definition of man, into our new roles as purveyors of modern masculinity and become 21st century men. I am man, hear me roar. Okay, now back up a bit, and check out How to Be a Modern Man...
Get the Moves Like Ramsay
The popularity of male celebrity chefs are a clear indicator that men are making their mark in the kitchen, and emulating one could be a sure fire way of earning much-needed brownie points with your better half (a much better currency compared to those old man-points). Start with something simple: a tasty pesto can be made by grinding a few handfuls of fresh basil, some nuts (if money ain’t a thang, use pine nuts, otherwise: cashews, almonds, or even sunflower seeds), a squeeze of lemon juice, a dollop of olive oil, and salt and pepper to taste. Mixed up with pasta, served next to a fresh green salad and voila, you’ve got your Jamie Oliver vibe on. Please take note that his moniker, The Naked Chef, was figurative – nudity and boiling oil don’t mix well. Unless you’re into that sort of thing *wink*.
Haters Gonna Hate, Hate, Hate / Bakers Gonna Bake, Bake, Bake
Since you're already getting your hands (and other body parts *double wink*) dirty in the kitchen, why not widen your horizons with something for your sweet tooth? Baking seems like the oft neglected sibling of cooking – no-one likes her because she’s just too difficult! But no matter how good that stir-fry is, it’s nowhere near as impressive as a crème brulee or super light chiffon cake. For a winning dessert (and an acceptable object of this shape allowed to be exposed in the kitchen) try these date balls: mix 1 part oats with 2 parts each of peanut butter and pitted dates; shape into one inch balls, roll in desiccated coconut, and serve!
I Got 99 Problems But A Dish Ain’t One
Do more than just pick up after yourself. Do the dishes without being coerced, bribed or threatened with physical violence: get some good dishwashing gloves, fill the sink with the hottest water possible and a few drops of dishwashing liquid, and mix to a frothy finish. Start with the least dirty (glasses and mugs) and work up to the really dirty (the pots and pans), refilling the sink whenever it gets too grimy, scouring each item well. It helps to have a second sink full of hot water to rinse off washed dishes. Seriously though. If you’ve made it this far in life and still don’t know how to wash dishes, then you’ve got to be questioning your priorities.
Will the Real 21st Century Man Please Stand Up
Be there for your partner, your friends, and your kids. You've only got a limited amount of time on the planet, so fill them with meaningful interactions with those you love. Make the interactions with strangers meaningful too. Prolonged doubled handed handshakes and hugs are probably an immediate no-no when you’re being introduced to someone new. You should, however, make eye contact, make an effort to repeat their names to them on introduction, and use it a few times during the conversation. This will help you remember their name, and will make a really good impression on them.
Our evolution, from club-wielding caveman to modern 21st century man, will be governed by our ability to break away from the old world ideas of what men are supposed to be. Cooking, baking, cleaning and being focused on personal interactions have all been conventionally female concerns, but they’re moving into the scope of the modern man. The challenge for us is to move away from the idea that we’re burping, farting, crotch-scratching fiends, and redefine what it means to man up.
Date Published: 07 August 2015
